someone's daughter.

a second gift.

being more tour dates.

yesssssssssssssssssssss :)

3 dates in February that I will be sure to be at.


p.s. best friends make me happy. they are always willing to listen to your craziness.
thank you aimee.
thank you billy!.

a gift.

for me.

i can't wait to see it.

i couldn't be happier right now...well i could, but that would just be asking too much. :)

factorygirl-photography

why you gotta break free.

band=girls.

im sick and tired of the way that i feel,
im sick of dreaming and its never for real.
im all alone with my deep thoughts.
im all alone with my heartache and my good intentions.

i work to eat and drink and sleep just to live,
feels like im never getting back what i give.
ive got a sad song in my sweet heart.
and all i really ever need is some love and attention

and i dont want to cry my whole life through,
i want to do some laughing too.
so come on, come on, come on, come on, laugh with me.
and i dont want to die without shaking up a leg or two,
yeah, i want to do some dancing too.
so come on, come on, come on, come on, dance with me.

sometimes youve just gotta make it for yourself.
sometimes sugar, it just takes someone else.
sometimes youve just gotta make it for yourself.
sometimes baby, you just need someone else.

top top!

so i haven't written in months...whatev. i just had to post this somewhere...

i've decided, i think that my top 5 kol songs go like this:
wicker chair
king of the rodeo
ragoo
trani
the bucket

the whigs (i need 10):
already young
half the world away
someone's daughter
(no order)
violet furs
o.k, alright
written invitation
hot bed
i got ideas
like a vibration
black lotus


and this will get even harder once more new songs come out! agh!

crazy ass shit.

last night was so fucking great. thank you a2. thank you p, j and t. thank you murfreesboro tennessee. thank you b and a. thank you kol in a weird ass way. thank you to the very nice murfreesboro cop that didn't give me a ticket. holy shit. hahahaha

finally home.

ralph.

i feel so terrible for those kids. losing a parent so young, would be so awful, i can't even imagine. and it breaks my heart when i realize that a lot of kids go through that. it actually makes me weep. i have never in my life been super close to someone that died. i've had one friend die, but i only knew him for a short period of time before. great-grandparents and great uncles and aunts but no one i truly loved/was really close to. i have all of my grandparents +2 (one set are divorced and remarried), all my aunts, uncles, cousins, parents, siblings, close friends. i can't even imagine. and it's almost like i don't know what to expect and i'm scared, i deal with death terribly, i cry about it even though i wasn't close with the person when they were alive. i get ridiculously sad when celebrities die, like heath, balled my eyes out that night just thinking about it.

i feel like i have this sick obsession with being sad. i enjoy it or something. i'm a drama queen. disgusting. my mom always called me one when i was little but it was cute then, now i'm annoyed with myself! i thrive on being upset. this is literally making me ill.
i think i'm heading back to a bad place where i don't like myself. i need some help.

low.

WHAT THE FUCK!
Farrah Fawcett died this morning of cancer. I was saddened but I knew it was coming. Then around 5 pm today I was informed that Michael Fucking Jackson died. I am so shocked and weirded out. My home town celebrity is gone. He is one of the greatest artists of all time. His songs are soooo great. (not that that needs to be said) This must have been how people felt when Elvis died. I am sick as a dog. I want to purge a few tears but it hurts my throat. Farrah is being overshadowed...but really I don't know what to say.

I started getting sick Sunday night and then on Tuesday it just HIT ME, worked 8 am-1 pm at the bookstore then 8 pm-2 am at the theater. THEN Wednesday I woke up in tears because I was so miserable. Worked 8 am-1 pm at the bookstore again then took a 1 hr nap and worked at the theater again from 6-12. It's just been a hell of a week and this making it worse. I want to cry out of frustration and sadness. I'm coughing up a lung. My throat is on fire. I miss my friends (besides people from work) I haven't seen them in 4 or 5 days! :(

gemini decades.

my mom is 50 today. woo go mom!

i made her a photo album, bought one of her fav movies and a great candle. :) i think i did good. unfortunately this day couldn't be less busy for her, i don't even know if we are all eating dinner together. grrrr... i had all of these ideas and everyone is messing them up. i was going to make a cake. my sister texts me the night before last saying that she wanted to do it and asked what kind to make. she was supposed to bring it over this morning before she had to go to work. she didn't. turns out that my stepdad told her not to.
ugh. nothing ever works out how i want it to...

as we go on

Today is my little brother's graduation. This is crazy. Plus, it's in the gym instead of out on the football field because it's threatening to rain. GROSS. It's going to be very hot in there.

my dad and brother.
my cousin (nate), my mom, my brother (joe)
joe and me
I am not focused enough to write the blog post I want to write right now.

oooooooooooh.

i am watching buffy as i type...

hanging out with kari and krisan all night. :)

frustratingly confused.

yesterday my little brother turned 18! gah! crazzzzzzzy.

i've had a great summer so far. i looooove kari and krisan and hanging out with them is so much fun. girl talk. working out. epic walks. chicago <--which we need to do more! i wish i had more money. ha
however, something in my life is missing. i don't really know what it is. i really want to travel around. i want to see california and new york and texas and and washington and georgia (you know why) and more of tennessee.
also, i need a loan from someone. i don't know what to do. i need $350 by june 4th! and i can't get that on my own. fuck. i don't want to ask my mom because she keeps complaining about how stressed out she is and i don't want to add to that. if i don't get the money then i can't sign up for my classes until after freshmen do, which means i will not get into classes i need to be in.
i need to stop being lazy too. i have projects that i want to get done this summer and if i keep watching the view and tyra every day and sitting on my computer for hours and hours; i won't get them done.

i need to clear my head and figure out exactly what i want right now.

yadda yadda yadda.

i am getting worse and worse at posting.

last night i accompanied krisan, kari and tammi to chicago so that krisan could see the features (damn 21+ shows). it was lots of fun, we need to go up to chicago more often to explore new places.
today the four of us visited mr. masty. we are going again tomorrow for a little bit. it will probably be the last time we ever see him because he is retiring. :( we also went to dunkin donuts.
i had the worst conversation with my mother. we talked about my brother being a shithead, then why he has been being a shithead, then about my jerk father. then later about my grandmother's cremation plans (she is not close to death...), next my great aunts are mad at each other, finally ending with my oldest great aunt's awful life. (seriously the poor woman has had a horrible time).
luckily the day ended well, kari and i worked out then watched some buffy. -angel is hot!-

one-eighty.

yesterday i was very disappointed with a certain someone. but sometimes...they surprise you. i am so grateful he isn't as ridiculous and self-obsessed as i thought he was.

he really cares. :)

melt.

the show was soooo good.

first of all, we got there at 5ish and aimee bought the LAST ticket available. crazy huh? then we walked around and sat in line and were freeeeezing cold. they let us in about 10 minutes late. the first band was okay. the horrors were amazing. i liked them before but now i am in love with them. plus, they are sooooooo beautiful. oh and i got the setlist. :)
the kills were absolutely fucking amazing. they blew my mind. allison fucking stared me down during the second song (which i didn't know the lyrics too). she got 5 inches away from my face, singing. then we both started laughing, i didn't know what to do. i was a little stunned. i am such a fan girl. gah! she is crazy, dancing all over the place. they are soooooo good, i can't even explain it.

more later. soooo tired, and going to steak and shake in 10 minutes, ugh. it best be a good night.

after the show i made aimee wait so i could meet allison. i ended up meeting most of the horrors and both of the kills. she was last, i shook her hand and told her the show was amazing and that she was really awesome. i'm a loser. basically.

breakage.

i finished my english final last night at 9:30 and then went to see kari. :)

it is summer and i'm about to leave to go see the kills and the horrors! i am excited.

finale finale the finale finale.

This week has been all finals. uggggh. it almost sucked me dry. Yesterday/today =lots of packing. Today (Friday) is move out day. I also have to finish up a take home english final...at least get parts of it done so I don't have to do too much at home. :\ Should get back to that instead of blogging but this the last post ever from a dorm room!!!

good bye residence halls, i will not miss you. your fattening food and your disgusting communal bathrooms and your ignorant noisy freshmen. wont miss it a bit.

ps grey's was AMAZING tonight. gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

pps there is a thunderstorm outside right now. i hope it is still storming when i go to sleep. :)

hatred.

fuck drama. can i have all my friends be boys? not that that would solve all of my problems but seriously, girls suck! why does this happen?

i need to get out of here. i started packing just to make myself feel better. i finally switched my major the other day. i'm officially a psych major now! YES!

brand new.

my cousin, Lesley, had her baby today. :) it's a boy named Jack Paul.
the last name brings it together but ...you know.

i'm excited. he is #4 of the next generation of my family. (weird, i feel so old.) poor mackenzie is the only girl still but i'm sure that will change eventually.

SURPRISE!

last night billy's best friend, laura, and i threw a surprise party for billy! it was awesome, she had NO idea. grrrreat. i messed up though, i forgot to inform a friend of the time schedule and she texted me asking me what was up 2 minutes before billy got there. i felt so bad and she was PISSED at me. when i said i'm sorry she said "yeah whatever". oooops. anyways, we had a band which was awesome, unfortunately the neighbors would only let us play til 9pm. LAMMMMMMMME. it's fucking grand prix weekend bitches, lighten up! anyway the band was pretty good, they have baby taste in music though. they like stuff like blink 182 and good charlotte. but that's what i liked before kari introduced me to the really good stuff, so i think i'm gonna make them a CD. because they have promise, they played "song 2" by blur. AMAZING SONG.


i need to do laundry. seriously. and shower, and brush my teeth. yuck.

summer is going to fucking rock. (except the working part.) kari just informed me of a formation of a new band. she said she got herself a drummer and a bassist and they are practicing every weekend. i'm so stoked to see this! i'm gonna have so much fun with aimee, andrea, eddie and peter too. i can't waaaaait.

13 days until summer. :)

sighs. moans. groans.

me=depressed.
this is how i feel exactly.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/7522177@N02/439711591/sizes/o/

my debit card number was stolen. my friends hate each other, some of them hate me at the moment. i miss my mommy. i want be having fun right now. my throat is starting to tickle. my nose is itchy. i'm sick of fucking school. i just want to go home.

i kind of just want to cry. but the tears won't come as steady as i want them too.

i am also PMSing.

candy day.

easter was soooo much fun. i had to be an adult which wasn't as much fun as being the kid but oh well. elizabeth and i were the first to arrive. then my grandparents and brother, sans dad, guess he had to work. then my pregnant cousin, lesley, and her husband, tod. elizabeth (my cousin), joe (my brother), and i got to hide the easter eggs which was just as fun as finding them. then my cousin, kathryn, her 2 kids, mackenzie (6) and alex (4), my cousin, greg, his fiancee, jen, and her son, logan (5) came. when i saw them coming up the drive i went to the door and kenzie's face was priceless, maybe she didn't know i was coming, she goes "RACHEL!" and jumped into my arms. All 3 of the little ones came in running and screaming "i saw an egg! i saw an egg!" i told them that i didn't see any eggs and that they were crazy. we ate yummmmmmmy food. i watched kenzie jump rope for a while. then alex and logan played cars in the front yard so i was watching all 3 kids at once. agh! haha it was getting chilly outside. finally, the easter egg hunt began! there were 60 eggs, 20 for each! (GEEEZ) once you got 20 you were done, too fair. haha i had kept one in the pocket of my dress, which took them forever to figure out. i guess logan won, since he found them all first. fun talks came later. it was a good day with family. :)

boooooyah!

I'M GETTING A NEW PHONE! YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

http://www.wireless.att.com/cell-phone-service/cell-phone-details/?device=Pantech+Matrix+-+Navy+Blue&q_sku=sku3020343

so excited.

la la la.

i'm so fucking bored right now.

i'm eating because i'm bored. the worst habit in the entire world.

except for heroin, i suppose...

pogo.

i am rocking word whomp right now! YES!

i love hanging out at my aunt's house. she is hilarious and super cool except i will not have a political conversation with her. i will not. i can't wait for easter. it's gonna be funny.

i'm in the process of trying to write a really good song. (lyrically) and when i get home aimee and i are going to get together and write some music. she texted me the other day saying "i wrote a song, come home and write me music!" :) haha

i need to find boy. it's been 2 weeks since i met him and i have not run into him again! damn large campuses. i am starting to feel like a creep. :\

maybe more later.

partying with the devil.

i didn't fail my exams! YAY! :) i got a high B on the psych one (2% away from an A, fuck.) and i don't know about the political science one yet. i have a stats homework i need to be doing right now. :\

i didn't get to go see the whigs friday. i was depressed.

instead, i sat at a friends kitchen table and had the funniest conversation that went from twilight (i loathe it) to sex to religion to heaven and hell to drunkeness back to sex to threesomes with brothers (ew) to kings of leon to my depression and back to heaven and hell.
at least that's the most of it.

only one april fool's prank was played on me. my brother called me and told me that when he turned 18 (which is coming soon) that he was getting the promotion that i have unfairly been cheated out of for two years now. i immediately called his bluff but he denied the fact that he was joking. i even talked to my mother but she said she had no idea, he told her the same thing. (that little fucker.) i called him out so many times and when i finally started yelling at him he goes "rachel, rachel, rachel! APRIL FOOL'S! hahahaha i got you!!!!!" i almost hung up the phone but instead i just told him that i didn't deserve that. haha
that little motherfucker. i will get him back one day.

speaking of the devil...the new kings "song" fucking sucks. maybe it's a joke? ha!

check one.

i hung out with a.j., brandon and tracee last night. it was fun. we ate in earhart. shared some stories with brandon from our adventures last year. he enjoyed them. haha then, we went to the pool hall and played for about 2 hours. it was nice. it reminded me of last year when i would hang out with the boys. :) after we came back from the pool hall, a.j. had to leave so we hung out at brandon's apartment for another 2-3 hours just sharing hilarious stories. brandon is the best storyteller. i was almost pissing my pants all night.

hopeful or pathetic?

source: http://www.flickr.com/photos/powerpig/3390256612/sizes/o/

i am so goddamn full of hope!
i am hopeful that sonia will not have to work and we can go see the whigs next friday!!!!!
i am hopeful that i see aj this weekend.
i am hopeful that i will be able to pull off a 3.0 GPA this semester.
i am hopeful that i will get my act together and start going to class again.
i am hopeful that i don't fail my two exams next week.
i am hopeful that i run into boy sometime within the next few days.
i am hopeful that he likes me.
i am hopeful that i can at some point learn how to balance fun and school.

maybe i'm just lame. maybe i'm lazy. fuck, maybe i am a ...

i'm fucking scared that none of these things (above) will happen and i'll be a failure.

source: http://www.flickr.com/photos/margaretv/3079472972/sizes/o/

fuck you.

sometimes people, that are the "closest" to you, are just not nice.

i just don't understand. i was/am so hurt.

p.s. i need to learn to stop hitting people. i'm not even kidding. i'm that much of a child.

super cool.

so...i met a boy today. :)

we have a lot in common.
he doesn't like labels or generalizations.
he loves music.
he's a songwriter. <3
my friends and i talked to him and his friend for almost 2 hours.
he kept giving me high fives and telling me how cool i was.
he gave me this incredibly long hug when we parted. seriously... super long.
he's very cute.

we have no way to contact each other. i keep telling the girls that we will run into him soon.

i really really hope so.

shoot me now.

i hate school. it should die. i don't even go to most of my classes anymore.

i can't wait until summer.

a week late.

the whigs were amazing!!! not many pictures, i had too much fun. i have tons of pictures of them anyway.



talked to them all, parker and tim were very very excited to see me. they both gave me several hugs. i always feel so loved after seeing them. haha we told them we'd be in nashville and they seemed to be quite happy. those guys are so fucking awesome. unfortunately i got kicked out early because of being underage. fuck that security guard. i was WITH tim and he still told me i couldn't stay.

woopie!

spring break, fuck yes!!!!!!!!!!!!

great...now i hear my mom and step-dad arguing about stupid shit.
i'm leaving this house. peace out, bitches.

one more class.

i once again have a ton of people in my room. i'm excited. i'm making a few friends that actually like some of the same music, and they are just plain awesome. :) we're watching fern gully right now. GREAT movie. it's a movie gone green before it was cool to go green. i'm also painting my nails right now. red yay!

one more class tomorrow morning and then i'm on SPRING BREAK! fuck yes. i can't wait to have no school for a week. and sit back at home and read and hopefully it will be warm enough to go on walks and take photos. i still have to pack a lot more. i'm the worst procrastinator.

also, i'm seeing the whigs tomorrow!!!! not on saturday though. :( i know, i'm a spoiled brat. i get sad when i only see a band once. haha hopefully i'll get to talk to them. they're such nice guys.

birthday weekend.

my birthday weekend was fun. Got sooooo drunk on Friday. probably the drunkest I've ever been, sloppy drunk too. kinda gross...oh well. i fell on my ass while dancing to BAD music, i tried to punch a punching bag and had to stand there and concentrate to make my fist hit the bag, and i drunk texted all my guy friends (they appreciate it the most). crazy night. no puking. no hangover. i'm amazing. haha went out on saturday too but i only had one drink, that was very good, but i had no desire to drink after getting so wasted the night before.

more later, when the thousands of people get out of my room. haha

edit:

i'm sooo ready for spring break.

it's my birthday!!!

I just want to run around!
I just want to party DOWN!
I just want to run around!
I just want to party DOWN!

Drug runs and beer busts, it's all I know!
I don't wanna grow up and have to let go!
I feel the pressure to change my ways!
All I see are more dark days!

??? teenage ways is on my brain!
Get away, a feeling I can't explain!
I don't want this thing to ever stop!
Just shut up, and hand over that pop!

Just 19 when I lost all my dignity!
Today's my birthday, and now I'm 20!
Don't wanna have responsibility!
Don't wanna be a part of society!

I wanna be where the boys are, too!
I wanna do the things I wanna do!
I won't do what you tell me to!
I don't wanna have to listen to you!

??? teenage ways is on my brain!
Get away, a feeling I can't explain!
I don't want this thing to ever stop!
Just shut up, and hand over that pop!

What's the point of doing something?
Every night gotta feel the pain!
Some people say that I'm disgusting!
I don't care, I just think they're lame!
Kill the rainbow, FEEL THE ROCKS!

Just 19 when I lost all my dignity!
Today's my birthday, and now I'm 20!
Don't wanna have responsibility!
Don't wanna be a part of society!

I just want to run around!
I just want to party DOWN!
I just want to run around!
Party DOWN, whoo!

Next year I'll be 21!
Look out, world, 'cuz I wanna have fun!
Next year I'll be 21!
Look out, world, 'cuz I wanna have FUN!

Super Soaked by Be Your Own Pet

i am busy.

skipping classes and being a teenager for the very last time!



10 hours left of childhood.


This is the last day I can live by this song. haha

19 you're only 19 for God's sake,
Oh, you don't need a boyfriend.
19 you're only 19 for God's sake,
Oh, you don't need a boyfriend.

Look what he's made you do to your arm again,
He said he'd come round but he's gone out with his friends,
And I know how it feels to be your age
And feel the world is caving in.

Another drama by the kitchen sink tonight,
You said you'd cut yourself whilst washing up the knives,
Another week off school won't do you any good,
And I know how it feels to be your age.

19. you're only 19 for God's sake,
Oh, you don't need a boyfriend.
19. you're only 19 for God's sake,
Oh, you don't need a boyfriend.

Come back with me, and find out what you really want,
Come home with me you'll only have to do it once,
'cause I know what it feels like to be your age,
You only have to do it once,
And never again.

Another drama by the kitchen sink tonight,
You said you'd cut yourself whilst washing up the knives,
Another week off school won't do you any good,
And I know how it feels to be your age.

You know I'm not so young,
I spend an hour getting ready every day,
And still I end up looking more or less the same,
But I could show you,
A thing or two.

Oh, I could show you the ropes,
Yes I could show you the ropes,
And I would cut my hair for you,
'Cause I know how it feels.

I know how it feels to be your age,
I know how it feels to be your age,
Oh, how I'd love to feel a girl your age,
Your age,
Once and never again!

-The Long Blondes
"Once and Never Again"

disclaimer: i am not a cutter. and no boy has actually ever made me want to cause myself harm. but...it's still very relevant.

bullshit.

i wish all friends could be good friends.

see, i have this friend (taylor) that has a boyfriend of 1 year. he's pretty cool, i don't want to see him all day, everyday (he's a hardcore republican) but i can surely stand him and he's super nice to me. her roommate (courtney) HATES him. always has. so she started going over to his dorm everyday instead of staying at ours. it has now turned into her leaving here ASAP and not coming home until 9-10 at night. she goes to bed by 11-12, not like me who is up until 2. and on the weekends she never comes home. so i get to hang out with her for an hour, maybe two, a day...and she lives DOWN THE HALL. she is over there 10 hours every single day! ridiculous much?
okay, so that sucks, and we've been around and around with this all semester and she doesn't speak to us about the situation in person, always over text or im. but my birthday is thursday and teece's is tomorrow. we are celebrating both on friday night. so i tell tay the plan: eating at windsor (girls only) at 5, getting ready, hookah!, spanish frat (i know...we'll see...) and she says "i'll have to pass on hookah and the frat" i ask "why?" she says "hookah makes me sick and i don't wanna go to a frat" so i say "ok, are you going to stay here and hang out with me on my actual birthday?" she says "i have a test thursday night." i couldn't even think of a response so i just typed "k" and she wrote back "sorry". no attempt, whatsoever, to hang out with me. SO WHEN THE FUCK ARE YOU GONNA HANG OUT WITH ME?!?!!?!?! my fucking birthday. she doesn't fucking care. fuck you.

i just want to SCREAM at her. but...if i started, she'd cry or make up some excuse.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

i dyed my hair today. YAY!


i only have 27 more hours of being a teenager. how exciting/weird.

looking for the cure.

ugh. i am sick sick sick. all of my friends were sick a week or two ago and now i got it.

fuck this. it sucks. i woke up with half a voice this morning. however, i love loosing my voice i think it sounds awesome! but my cousin heard me and turned into supermom. she put drugs in my hand told me to lay back down and go to sleep rather than getting up to go to class. did i mention that i love her?

so tonight i watched:
my blueberry nights
the royal tenenbaums
dazed and confused
21

my blueberry nights was awful. i had such high hopes for it but it sucked. it had too many short little plots that weren't developed and you didn't even have time to like the characters.


the royal tenenbaums was amazing. i had seen parts of it before and it was even better than i remember. i love love love gwyneth paltrow in this movie.



dazed and confused i had seen before. AMAZING stuff. i wish my high school was like that (sorta). that movie portrays it so much cooler than it actually was. which is probably why i love the movie.

21. seen it several times, it's on now as background noise. GREAT movie. winner winner chicken dinner.

going to bed now, let's kick this colds ass.

twenty8twelve.

i love this collection. i'm not crazy about some of the prints but the basic styles... :)
i especially love the outfit on the left.

i need to go thrifting NOW!! haha

7 deadly sins.

you know... i have no other desire more than the want to get my body in shape. i hate being "chubby". but i can't commit to acting on these wishes. i am lazy. i hate that.

i need to feel inspired. i'm SO not inspired here. in this little room. with my friends i love so so so much but have barely anything in common with. i want it to be summer...SO BADLY.

since i'm too embarrassed to talk about some of my issues with my friends, i should really see a shrink. AND i could get free counseling because of school. i really should do it.

now listening to: matt nathanson

peanut butter + banana.

i cleaned today. i did half of my laundry because i couldn't possibly have the energy to do the other half. oh and went to psychology. we talked about personality, which is my FAVE!
i can't wait for warm weather this cold shit sucks. i can't wait to take walks and photos with kari. :) it is now what i'm looking forward to most.

oh and seeing the whigs a possible 3 times in 3 days. :)

also, i'm in the midst of planning my 20th (joint) birthday extravaganza.

hopeful for tomorrow.

today i watched Pillow Talk, starring doris day. it was pretty entertaining. it was pretty risque for a movie made in the 50s which was awesome! haha there were several 'laugh out loud' moments. it had some of the great qualities of another amazing older movie, Mclintock!, starring John Wayne and Maureen O'Hara. i love that movie. i love john wayne. it's fricken hilarious. i want to see more classic movies.


And I am *not* intoxicated... yet!
-G.W. McLintock

i'm going to start working out again tomorrow. the last 2 weeks i slacked. i hope it's nice weather tomorrow, i want to take some pictures.

sans hangover.

so Friday the 13th was fun.

tara, kevin, audrey, avery & i went down to IU for the night. went to a party where we met up with some people i went to high school with. even ran into my little brother's best friend, weird. i was having fun because i had gotten the perfect drunk-where i was carefree, happy, laughing, hugging, etc. :) unfortunately all of this was ruined when my little brother's best friend called tara (who he had been flirting with all night) a slut for kissing some guy.
...really?!!!?! are we 13?
he is a senior in high school, young, yes, but no excuse. stupid little boy.

so she got really upset because he was telling everyone that she was a slut (and the fact that she was very drunk didn't help). so i consoled her outside for a while. i had just come inside when one the kids that lived there appeared and said, laughing hysterically, "OH MY GOSH, COME HERE!" i followed him downstairs to see this same stupid little boy passed out in a pool of his own vomit. the guys thought it was funny but i have this mom thing about me where i worry about everything. i instantly sobered up (fuck!) and tediously dragged him into the bathroom. he was only semi-conscious and convulsing. stupid boy. his breathing was fine though so i gave him water and a blanket and pointed him towards the toilet. he could speak and i wasn't happy with him so that was good enough for me. i spent the rest of the night taking care of him, tara, and kevin until he (kevin) abandoned me because he wanted to go see his ex-girlfriend's apartment. he told me he'd be back really soon because he had to "look out" for tara and i. he didn't come back until this morning, that fuck-tard.
i slept little. trying to keep the asshole of a little boy away from my friend.
oh yeah, also i was awakened by a bunch of people coming into the house at 6am yelling "HOOHOO HOOSIERS, HOO HOO HOOSIERS!" they soon settled down and went downstairs to pass out. however 2 hours later they stormed upstairs yelling about wanting more to drink and then left. wow.

on another note, i did like the atmosphere of IU better than Purdue. and when we went out to eat this afternoon...bloomington just seems so cool. maybe i should hang around downtown lafayette some more, that should make me feel better.

then again, maybe i did go to the wrong school...

...the beginning.

i don't have a very exciting life but i really want to try to keep this up.

i'm going to try and write reviews and journal entries whenever possible.

right now i'm on a high from kings of leon winning a grammy. it's crazy/weird that they've gotten so big. :\ i don't really like it. whatever. if they make good music i will be a fan, if they start making shitty music, i will grow to dislike them. that is that.